Despite my best intention I managed to get to the gym only three times again this week. Monday and Tuesday I did my regular workout of half an hour cardio and an 50 minute or so other exercise after that. Wednesday I gave the cardio camp another try. It felt wrong again on my knees and lower legs. Next week will be the last chance for me to get comfortable with it: I bought new workout shoes. If they work out and soften enough the impact on jumping around on my knee I will stick to the class. If they don’t than in this case will not follow that advice of no pain no gain. I am feeling the wrong kind of pain here I think.

There were two deaths this week that shook my spiritual world. On one hand an elderly woman passed away I knew from an online community for 14 years. She was described by other members of the community as

• having lived well
• being fiercly libreal, 
• having a strong, caring, funny soul
• whose presence inspires
• having strong sens of what was right and wrong

I wans’t particularly close to her, but know that almost always agreed with her and found her attention to other members valuable. I will miss her passionate voice.

The other death is even less personal: I read a lot about the background of Aaron Swartz and his suicide. These two passing made me stop and wonder whether I am living the life that

• I want to
• is worth living
• would be remembered in such positive terms as my online friend’s was.

As usual there are no answers, just pondering what if anything should I change to get better answers to the questions above.

This post is part of the series answering how I did this week with my new year resolution of having more fun, working on my body, and being more spiritual?