This year I will answer the 10 questions, one a day for each day between Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, provided by the 10Q project/space. I hope to gain some insight for myself about my past year and hence for my next year form this exercise.
The first question: Describe a significant experience that has happened in the past year. How did it affect you? Are you grateful? Relieved? Resentful? Inspired?
And my answer: I quit my dayjob. And I did it without having secured additional work to replace the missed income. (I do have a second job, which provides for more than half of our needs) This is big for me. It means that I trusted more my abilities to make ends meet that my need for security. I did have some projects lined up, when I quit, but now I want to prove myself that months after month I will be able to make enough money. I am also trying to set my eyes on higher goals: beyond “enough” revenues I want to do it in a way that is more fulfilling and meaningful for me. I am on my path to find my path. Again.
Part of what I feel is fear. Fear that I won’t make it. Fear that if I choose to do one thing I will miss out on other thing. I also feel inspired. This decision gives me a freedom to explore new things, ideas, connections. I am not locked into what I didn’t fully enjoy, but can experiment to find what I am best at, what I am having the most fun with and maximize what I can contribute to the world.